unsure
I haven’t written a blog post in three weeks.
I’m serious.
Maybe that confuses you since there’s been posts here at The Grit during that time. But that’s purely the miracle of Scheduled Posts right there.
And now…
Now I’m all out of pre-recorded messages.
I’ve got no more scheduled posts in my pocket.
So there will most likely be a bit of silence here for a while as I navigate through some difficult and painful stuff. Or try to anyway…
I haven’t been online very much, and I most likely will continue to be offline for a bit longer. But when I do get a moment to check in, I wanna try to catch up with you.
I’ve missed you.
I miss feeling connected to you.
So leave me a link to your favorite personal blog post from the past couple weeks—one that you’ve written. I may not be able to catch up on all the posts I’ve missed, but I will at least read all your personal favs.
Or just let me know what’s going on in your world. I’d love to hear.
Really I would.
Thanks for ever being patient with me. For ever extending grace my direction.
My heart is grateful.
I haven’t written any blog posts in months, so I guess I’ll write about my life. And perhaps this may be a blog post in and of itself. Just on your page. In the comments. Where random and varied people may read.
I saw a wall hanging today in Target that said, “Home is where your story begins.” It really struck me at the time. And while I can’t verify the accurateness or validity of that statement, it may very well be true of me, right now.
I now live in California. Home of beautiful weather, great wines, and Hollywood. And this place feels like home to me. It feels like home on so many levels of my soul that … I’m not sure when the last time was I felt like this. My soul called it home on the move out. It just tumbled off my lips as though it had every right to. As I crossed the border into California I felt such a sense of rightness … I was grinning from shoulder to shoulder and said to myself, “California is my home state.” I’ve never lived here before. I feel this sense of rightness almost constantly … I look around at the hills and landscape and I frequently stop and just thank God for bringing me here. Something about here is so RIGHT. It is home.
I have realized in the past few months, that there is a theme woven throughout my history. A thread, barely visible at times, blatantly obvious at others, that weaves its way through all my moves and life experiences. My marriage was actually a small side plot in this grand theme, not the main event like I thought for SO long. In some ways I’m in the middle of this grand thematic story, and in some ways I’m just beginning it. My view is limited, as are all of ours when we attempt to glimpse the future. I don’t know what my life will turn out like. But on some level … I wonder at the forecast of that simple decoration in Target.
Home is where your story begins.
rrg. can you fix that tag for me, Alece? I think it may be my iPad, although that doesn’t make sense. But it happens virtually ANY time I try to use html on the web. :( Thanks.
It’s really a lot less about what i write these days, but what I shoot @ whatsthisphotofor.com :-)
@bajanpoet says:
I’ll tell you this: I LOVE YOU. And I’m right there with you. I’m going through my own stuff right now too … and I feel like – right now – I’m looking toward my rebirth. I want to embrace my middle name: Rene … REBORN….. and although right now I’m still in hiatus and looking toward my resurrection, I feel more capable of seeing the end of the tunnel, of seeing my rebirth. (I hope that feeling lasts for a bit longer!)
Anyway, I processed some of my feelings on this blog post: http://bajanpoet.wordpress.com/2010/11/12/a-quest-for-passion/.
As we both process our lives, may that quest keep us both moving forward.
Love u, my sister….
Praying for you today.
X
Mercedes
@mallyflip says:
Alece,
I love you and I am praying for you. I am so thankful for your friendship. I am thankful that the Lord has brought us together.
This is where my heart currently is….
http://mallyeryn.wordpress.com/2010/11/09/savior-please/
Take a listen.
Love you!
@atangie says:
You are some kind of wonderful, Alece.
Here’s a bullet list for you as an update:
- Doing National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo). Your brother is too. It’s been fun thus far.
- Received in my hands the document that makes Kaitlynn’s adoption official.
- Kept breathing through some very hard good-byes.
- Started watching Grey’s Anatomy. Hooked.
- Been trying to make new friends. Not easy.
I love you and I am proud of you!
http://www.threadbaresoldier.com/?p=1368
took me two weeks to write anything. even now it’s getting harder and harder to breathe.
I’ve been blogging a lot lately, but mostly about the writing challenge I’m a part of for November. So far, I have three favorites:
25,000+ Words: http://greaterthanknowledge.wordpress.com/2010/11/08/nanowrimo-day-7-25000-words/
The Plot of The Pharaoh: http://greaterthanknowledge.wordpress.com/2010/11/11/nanowrimo-day-10-the-plot-of-the-pharaoh/
The Passion in Writing: http://greaterthanknowledge.wordpress.com/2010/11/13/nanowrimo-day-12-the-passion-in-writing/
All my other posts detail my stories and details about my experiences with NaNoWriMo
Love you, Beece!
Andrew
I’ve only written two posts in the last two months but both have come in the last week. but in them more than two months worth of my lfe. I couldn’t pick just one.
http://seekfightpray.blogspot.com/2010/11/riches.html
http://seekfightpray.blogspot.com/2010/11/irrational-fear.html
My life has been exceptionally emotional as of late. A little over a week ago, my Mother-in-law passed away and my husband has been in the States taking care of her business affairs. I’ve been sick and stressed and managing these five crazy kiddos by myself. I’ve not eaten nearly enough chocolate for the amount of stress I’m under.
But, to distract myself, I read a book. Churched is the title. It got me to thinking about my Fundamentalist upbringing and invoked many a blog post as a result. Here is my favorite at the moment…
http://perfectinhim.blogspot.com/2010/11/more-thoughts-stemming-from-churched.html
Take care of yourself, Alece. Hugs!
I’ve haven’t been blogging much lately either. But this post was scheduled for today and is the beginning part of the journey Joe and I are on lately.
http://katieballard.wordpress.com/2010/11/16/nostra-famiglia-italiana/
Alece, you don’t have to keep up with the blog for us. We love you, but we understand. It’s okay to sit quietly for a while. We’ll sit quietly with you and wait until you’re ready to talk again. That’s what friends are for.
This last part…. my exact words I was about to say.
@mat2820b says:
Me too.
I am definitely praying for you. I wish there was something magical I could say that could make everything better for you. The only thing I know to say is that you are loved and prayed for.
I am linking a vlog I did last week. It felt really awkward doing this, but I think it helped people better understand me.
http://theperkinsblog.net/2010/11/10/this-is-me/
Praying for He breathes fresh air into you.
Take as much time as you need Alece….and know that you are being prayed for. Truly.
My fav post was one I wrote about coming to realize God’s love for me once again.
http://sohappytolove.blogspot.com/2010/10/jesus-loves-me.html
And this post was inspired by something I learned from YOU…(as you can see in the title.) I linked to your page in this one…
http://sohappytolove.blogspot.com/2010/11/doing-it-afraid.html
@maryjohess says:
I’ve missed you friend. But I’ve been praying for you during this time. And sending lots of love and thoughts your way. Take care of yourself! ((hugs))
My favorite post I wrote: http://maryhess.com/2010/11/15/we-are-living-proof/
It was a week of miracles!
xxx M.
Hey Alece.
I didn’t even know you could do scheduled blog posts! That seems like an investment to me. And that you’re still investing in us, even when you are at a loss for words. Stay encouraged. I am also in a season of figuring myself out before I publish myself on the blog world. You can check me out if you like ^_^
http://tinamarink.blogspot.com/
Love.
@XCWATERBOY says:
well here’s to shameless promotion that people ask for. the following is pretty much the only serious blog I’ve written in a while. Being at home just isn’t quite as inspirational as being overseas I guess, though I do have the idea for a blog that I will hopefully write this morning. Stay tuned for an email from me and stay well, you rock.
http://mattpeirce.wordpress.com/2010/11/07/defending-church/
Faith stretching is always at its best when walking through the valley, Friend! The sun rays will start to pop through the clouds, one by one… and you will feel the Son shining down on your face once again. He is there comoforting and guiding you, and I know from your writings that you have a plethora of friends who “come alongside” you through the valleys… because that is what we are called to do.
Coming alongside you in prayer,
~TH
http://www.takingheart.net/2010/11/rough-and-wonderful.html
i’m smack dab in the middle of re-entry after traveling for 11 months to 11 different countries. it’s been a [difficult] process to say the very least.
here’s one of my latest : http://ashleyhiggins.theworldrace.org/?filename=it-was-a-good-idea-at-the-time
God uses our brokenness to bring his light shining through.
praying,
gC
http://www.colburns.net
Here’s one I wrote back in October:
http://mifocals.wordpress.com/2010/10/06/rain-not-the-k-pop-star/
It’s been hard for me to blog these days too.
Hi Alece,
I know it’s so cliche but it’s true, time does heal all wounds. That along with prayer is what got me through and is still getting me through each day. Praying for you as you walk out this journey. Everyday is a brand new day, enjoy it, live in it and know that happiness, peace and God’s best for you will be found again. You are my hero!!!
-Michelle
http://michellenicoleandjesus.blogspot.com/2010/10/breakdown-to-breakthrough.html
I recently came across your blog and I ended up reading every post (usually what I do on new blogs that I start reading). Anyway, what strikes me most about what you are going through is that you are continually striving to glorify God in the midst of all your great pain and uncertainty. And that is something that I too am trying to do in the midst of my struggle as our 4 year old daughter fights for her life through stage 4 cancer. We are missionaries in Haiti and recently had to return to the states for Susana’s treatment. Much of our blog at http://www.howcantheyhear.org is about our ministry to the orphans and the poor in Haiti as well as our own personal journey of walking with God through the mountains and valleys of our lives. But our desire is just like yours…bring Him glory in all that we go through.
I am convinced that the Lord is creating a beautiful tapestry in your life that will be used to bring Him much glory. Be encouraged. He causes ALL things to work together for good to those who love Him and are called by His purposes. Thanks for sharing your heart.
@ModernReject says:
Alece, thank you for your constant transparency, honesty, humility, and graciousness. Know that even when you might feel your weakest, God translates that to us all as His strength in you, for His glory, no grit, just glory.
Praying and thanking.
Alece, you inspire me so. I’ve followed your blog for a while and your transparency, especially in your guest post at Love Wins, has finally enabled me to tell my story here (although I’m still working on being as transparent as you…maybe someday!) And since you asked for our stories, here goes…My story starts about 5 years ago when I was a missionary…as was my husband, my now ex-husband. He too had an affair and it wrecked my life in so many ways, in all ways. What hurt even more though, was that during the time before the divorce was final many terrible things came to light about my soon to be ex-husband and I quickly realized I was to blame as well. Did he tell me he was misappropriating funds and donations? No. But I did know I was driving a $50,000 car and taking lavish vacations- and clearly this didn’t fit with life as a missionary. I enjoyed all the “things” though, they helped soothe my heart which constantly hurt from a marriage that was less than perfect. Did he tell me that his goal was not to glorify the Lord but to scam and profit from Godly, giving and trusting people? No. But I knew his heart well and I knew that God was not a priority. I knew that he…we…were literally making a killing in life as missionaries. And I was in it for the right reasons so that made me better, right? Did I know that he was literally scamming all the people that were closest to our hearts? I was never directly told but I knew that all that money was not going to the missions. But the donors thought it was and I was clearly doing Godly work to bring His word and promise to the world- so that made me better, right? That made it okay, right?
So what did I do about all these things? I didn’t ask questions. I knew in my heart but felt that if I was never directly told then I wasn’t at fault. I was so wrong. After the realization that I was so much at fault, I used that as an excuse to continue making bad decisions. Also, I was so afraid of what my friends, my family and my church community would think of me and even if they thought the worst…I had no defense, it was all true. So the old saying “Oh the web we weave when first we practice to deceive” became my life. I had to continue to lie to cover up what I had done in the past. I had to continue to highlight my ex-husbands faults in hopes it would keep the light off me. I had to continue to cheat donors and misappropriate money because I had nothing after my husband and I split. I lied and cheated everyone we had in the past and I even brought new people in, people who came to my rescue in midst of the affair and pending divorce. I lost very dear, long time friends. I outwardly blamed it on them, saying they were not real friends in the first place. However, inside, I knew that I had lied, cheated and taken advantage of them and they were on to me. The lies, the whole made up life, had become incredibly huge, so huge that sometimes even I couldn’t discern my real life from the one I created. Honestly, I could have lived the rest of my life like that. However, at the urging of my closest friends, the ones who left me, the ones who were on to me, I finally came clean.
I came clean to my closest friends first, then they helped me come clean to my family, then all of them helped me come clean to my church and then, maybe the hardest, I knew I had to come clean to blog friends, my greatest supporters. It was hell. It was terrible, I won’t lie. But to my dismay, many people responded that they already knew or suspected most of what I had to say. They loved me anyway and their love, trust and respect only grew because I loved them enough to tell the truth. After the initial crisis, I realized it was the first time in nearly 10 years that I was true to myself, the first time I could be myself…and it felt good. I still work on the relationships I damaged and have found that those relationships have become deeper than I ever knew possible. I no longer have a blog. Maybe someday when I’ve had more practice just being myself I will write again, but now I just need this time to build the life I once denied myself. And I have a long way to go. But, as for making things right, it was completely worth it. It was the beginning of my transformation, my redemption. Thank you so much Alece. You have inspired to take the much needed next step in my journey…sharing my story.
@gritandglory says:
i think i held my breath the entire time i was reading this… and at the end, all i have is an exhale and a hug. thank you for sharing so transparently and honestly. thank you. truly.
Slowly Healing:
I have read your comment a few times. I wanted to find the right words. Finally, Jesus’s own words in Matthew 9:5 came to me: “Which is easier: to say ‘your sins are forgiven’ or to say ‘get up and walk’?”
In a way, you had been paralyzed by a lie until Christ, the Truth, set you free. That is what He does. And that is why He came. Angry friends and furious Christians will want it to be different, but they need to see the Truth as well — that “where sin increased, grace increased all the more.” So, my beloved sister, take heart: for your sins are forgiven — get up and walk with Him.
@coffhaus says:
Slowly Healing: I read your comment, and all I can think is that you are absolutely beautiful. I know that I know the Father thinks you are beautiful too. I don’t know you, what you look like or anything about you except what you wrote above…and the only thing I see is the beauty of the Lord in an open and transparent heart.
Isaiah 62:2-4 – “And the nations shall see your righteousness and vindication [your rightness and justice--not your own, but His ascribed to you], and all kings shall behold your salvation and glory; and you shall be called by a new name which the mouth of the Lord shall name. You shall also be [so beautiful and prosperous as to be thought of as] a crown of glory and honor in the hand of the Lord, and a royal diadem [exceedingly beautiful] in the hand of your God. You [Judah] shall no more be termed Forsaken, nor shall your land be called Desolate any more. But you shall be called Hephzibah [My delight is in her], and your land be called Beulah [married]; for the Lord delights in you, and your land shall be married [owned and protected by the Lord].”
Wow. I applaud your courage. Thank you for sharing. May God bless you.
@moweezle says:
heard the news….. Love you so much and am praying for you!
Praying for you, Alece.
http://amber-banks.blogspot.com/2010/11/too-deep-is-never-too-deep.html
@christielici0us says:
Saying a prayer for you right now.
@kamriereed says:
I am a little computer illiterate and have no idea how to do it. but copy and pasting is my best friend so here is the web address and you can copy and paste it in the web thing
@kamriereed says:
here ya go http://scarletcordm.com/2010/11/10/literal-human-shields/
Sweetie, I am horrible at linking blogs and all that jazz. But this is for you, well maybe not for you, but definitely for me. And I think maybe for you too.
http://www.graceisforsinners.com
Be Still
Go read it my dear.
@crittyjoy says:
In nothing else this year I have learned that in brokeness there is beauty. In quiet there is beauty. In pain there is beauty. In redemption there is beauty. In healing there is beauty.
You are beautiful Alece. Praying for you. Be still and know that He is your God. Quiet is good. He does beautiful things in the quiet. Of this I am sure.
Sending Love your way. ♥
This has been my favorite post of mine so far this month because it is so where I am… http://crittyjoy.typepad.com/critty_joy/2010/11/weariness-and-thankfulness.html
@bahava says:
i want some red bows today… http://bahava.wordpress.com/2010/11/02/red-bows-yes-and/
i want that for you too…
praying…love you.
@JewelzSightings says:
Last thing I wrote was this: http://jewelsightings.blogspot.com/2010/10/hidden-places-of-soul.html
praying for you, alece….
@danielleH says:
I dont blog much – but I like my “immediatley” post from yesterday.
I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you!
I never quite understood this until my friends explained it to me:
http://thenoreaster.wordpress.com/2010/11/11/being-nor/
Alece,
In your time of clouded clarity, please know that I am SURE that you created a ministry that has forever changed my life for the better.
I have never met you, but I am forever thankful for everything that Thrive Africa has done for me and the people of South Africa.
I don’t know if you know this, or have heard it, but I wrote a parody of a song about my time as a NextStep intern.
This is the final verse:
Thrive Africa you’re the best
You’ve put us all to the test
You pray and serve and God does the rest
You’ve never given me trouble
And Made sure that life’s not a struggle
Y’all saved me from a future of rubble
So I will not forget you,
You are my Thrive Family
And with a thankful heart I
Will fly back to D.C.
I will be praying for you. Thank you again.
Kaitlyn
Miss you. We need a catch up date fo sho.
The Cliff Notes version of what’s going on here:
homeschool, and more homeschool. Everyday I think I made a mistake, and everyday I remember why we’re doing it. Nothing tugs on my heart more.
Aidan gets his psychological evaluations back this Friday. I’m a nervous wreck and have had moments of “burst into tears-ness” that I quickly recover from, all in the name of….. not enough time to cry about it. ;o)
And basically those two things consume my days. I’ve posted a bit, but nothing substantial….oh, I posted some family pics we had done the other day if you want to mosey on over and have a look-see. ;o)
Love you!
I don’t know that I have a favorite post. I’ve been posting mostly “fluffy” stuff and links lately, because I’ve run out of words too.
Praying for you in that wordless space.
@mjdagenhart says:
I’m taking a class this quarter that is absolutely killing me. But it may also be helping me come out of my hibernation. I’ve managed to get a few posts up lately.
http://mjdagenhart.wordpress.com/2010/11/15/senior-musings/
http://mjdagenhart.wordpress.com/2010/11/17/i-miss-new-york/
Love you, friend.
@nicoleunice says:
hey girl,
thanks for leading the way for me in honesty & vulnerability. My favorite post in the last couple of weeks was written with your help. It’s my follow-up to the question on how honest am I as a writer….and how honest do I need to be.
http://www.thestubbornservant.com/2010/11/12/honesty-part-two/
Praying for you during this transition season. May it be spring and not fall. But either way, may God be near.
I’ve had a lack of words when it has come to my blog lately, especially with all the transitioning that’s going on. But, here’s a link to one I wrote at the end of October:
http://africajen2009.wordpress.com/2010/10/29/there-is-a-time/
This is where I’ve been lately…
http://mylifebyfaith.wordpress.com/2010/11/08/the-dreaded-question/
Thankfully things have improved and I’m feeling somewhat normal for now, but not quite fully normal by most people’s standards. The rollercoaster ride and challenge continues…
Love to you!
@onestitchrachel says:
You’re not the only one lacking words…I’ve been there lately, too. The link I’m leaving is the best I’ve written in the past couple of months – about keeping the faith in the midst of depression.
http://thescienceofmusic.blogspot.com/2010/10/when-mama-aint-happy.html
@coffhaus says:
Alece: I have not been reading all the blogs I like lately, but I do try to catch yours. Your definitely one of my top favorites. I pray that you are blessed with abundant grace and peace for this season you are in. I pray your season of dancing is just a waltz away.
http://www.clearbrilliantcrystal.com/?p=369
Just look at the picture I took here. Let me know if you want to come with me to see what’s really down that road! Hang in there, Alece… Prayers going up for you.
http://tswailes.blogspot.com/2010/11/road-less-traveled.html
Alece,
You’re amazing. This is my first time commenting, but I admire your courage in telling us what is going on with you.
I’m actually in a similar position, I have thoughts and ideas to write, but the words won’t come.
This is the very last thing I’ve written, the post I am most proud of.
http://sunnychick104.blogspot.com/2010/11/come-home.html
Praying for you sister,
Sol
You take care of yourself……and thanks for the encouragement from your blog……..
I write a blog with my husband on adoption.
However, today my favorite blog post comes from the blog I write about food. The topic of this blog is my passion.
My most recent post was inspired by my mom who says she doesn’t struggle with eating, but does struggle with feeling rejected when others don’t eat what she has prepared.
Enjoy! http://foodliesandtruth.blogspot.com/2010/11/thanksgiving-day-tips.html
@amandalou01 says:
I have no link for you since I stopped blogging a couple of months ago, but I know that feeling. Sometimes, unplugged is best. Hope you have a restful weekend! :)
While I have been writing I haven’t written anything that I would say is a favorite lately just little installments about each week of my life in order to get me through my last semester of college and to keep members of my fam entertained. So really the only thing going on with me lately is preparing for graduation and trying not to think about what comes after since I have no idea what I want to do.
Praying for you Alece and ditto to what Katie said – “Alece, you don’t have to keep up with the blog for us. We love you, but we understand. It’s okay to sit quietly for a while. We’ll sit quietly with you and wait until you’re ready to talk again. That’s what friends are for.”
G
You hangin in sweetie? Thinking and praying for you tonight.
If you believe, you will see the glory of God. –Jesus Christ, John 11:40
@20BOLD11 says:
:hugs:
God has put you on my heart a lot lately. One of those strange/random/God things that I can’t explain but I have been thinking about you and wanted to share my prayer for you:
Father God, I thank you for the incredibly, loving, kind, gracious, and merciful Father that you are. Thank you that you promise in your Word to never leave nor forsake us. Thank you that you are faithful to meet all our needs. Father I thank you for the love you have for Lece. Thank you that you have kept her these last few years, day after day, tear after tear; that you have comforted her, filled her with your unexplainable peace and joy, that you have strengthened her to deal with life’s storms in a way that would be impossible with you. Father I lift her up to you right now in the name of Jesus; you know what is on her heart; her concerns, her questions, her hurts and her anxieties. I pray you would give her peace first and foremost in knowing that you have plans for her life–plans to prosper her and to give her a hope and a future. I pray that you would strengthen her where she is weak to be able to face the unknown that’s ahead of her and the joy in knowing it is all according to your will and for your glory. Most of all I pray she would continue to lean on you, her rock and her refuge, for all that she needs during this time and that you would use others around her as instruments of your love, comfort, grace, kindness and deliverance. We praise you and give you thanks for all you have done and all you will do. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
As for me, I have been busy wrapping up the semester at grad school and preparing for my son’s 1st birthday. I’ve written a lot of heavy posts lately but I think this one has to be the current favorite: http://holyghostgirl2010.wordpress.com/2010/11/09/monkey-business/ I pray it’ll bring a smile to your face :)
Oh and I started following you on twitter and sent you a “reply” is what they call it I think? (I’m a newbie–can you tell?) but not sure if you could see it since my tweets are protected. If you see fit, I’d be honored if we could keep in touch through that.
Lots of love and blessings to you.
@20BOLD11 says:
Typo in the prayer (impossible without* you). Sorry I was typing fast as the HS was giving me the words.
I would undermine all of my work if I said this was my “favorite” in the past few weeks, but I send you the link in hopes that it might cheer you up a bit. Praying for your heart. http://www.joyeggerichs.com/?p=2542